5 year olds eligible to get the Pfizer vaccine excited by the promise of free weed and guns for getting their shot

Pfizer Asks F.D.A. to Authorize Its Covid-19 Vaccine for Children 5 to 11. The agency has promised to move quickly on the request and tentatively plans to meet on Oct. 26 to consider it.

A new tier of eligibility is opening up for the COVID-19 vaccine. Soon, 5–11 year olds are expected to be able to receive their Pfizer shots as well as teens and adults, and many are excited by the prospects of all the free stuff given to their parents earlier this year.

This includes a long list of enticing incentives, including: free weed, free guns, free gas gift cards, free donuts, free tickets to a theme park, and free groceries.

Many children remain unsure of what the issue with getting the vaccine was in the first place — after all, many kids stated that “they just got their chicken pox shot, what’s the big deal?” But nevertheless, kids across the nation are excited by the goodies that await them when they get their COVID-19 jab.

As one six year old girl named Ruby explained, this sets a great precedent. When she’s due for her next tetanus shot, she plans to demand a free pair of Louis Vuitton heels or she’ll start screaming at every single school assembly about how her rights are being taken away.